Archive for December, 2012

Boss John Curisity

Comparing star to a sweet meat. Very obviously, expressing the urge to bite, tear, consume.

Star would say he got very excited over a cake but I doubt he’d allow this possibility.

‘I’ve become nauseated now.’

Much later, after strongly implying that rape is a threat, she seduces him. A battle of wills, even during the sex. She succeeds in mashing his brains

Auggo Crow-catcher. Young, handsome, practical. A nice guy, unjudgemental, even unblinking at things that seem bizarre to others, he simply gets on with things as he knows they should be. Some principle of solidarity or work for work’s sake. (Gandalf the grey sweating, hair ragged, concentrating on the task)

The deep gnomes lived underneath/around the telukbetang human community for centuries. at first viewed as faeries, daemons, at least a part of the culture, they came to be seen more and more negatively and seperate.
Called unconcerned, not in an aloof way, but a shrinking, scared, calculating way.
Somewhat mixed up with the immigrants, with the Bosnian back-and-forth?
Ironically Nev has many of these worse traits; as if he is somewhat justified to suffer the malice.
A thief/general named Boss Ynawg Curiosity invades, persecutes the natives and the deep gnomes, but his behaviour is reflected in the natives reaction in turn. Deep-warrens blocked and burnt out, charred children’s corpses.
In a war we can see things play out. The politics, the conversations in corridors between great halls. Bosnia’s mix-up, abject enemies in their former opponent-jews’ houses, then back around again.

Mr Blake

Strange to relate to another guy’s libido – I feel i’m not sharing very well but even so I’m not getting enough! And that’s fucking me up a lot, so it seems unsurprising he’s so fucked up right now, even though it ‘s always been intimated it’s a lower priority to him. To me it’s a little humiliating, two guys dying for more attention, hoping the female will reciprocate – more often. Though it probably seems fitting to him – how he reveres Women and continually does not respect himself. Once I start writing I stop feeling the flow.
Satan’s darkness
promises destruction

I brought up the pig(p i y?) again last night – the exact day after contemplating him for exactly the same reason. A little scared, not completely trusting D in a rather fantastical way. Of voicing demon’s names in the presence of a cypher. (He would have to go to so much effort for little gain though to be a cypher)
E you are gentle with him so much but limited gentleness with me. I become very vulnerable and the best you can say is ‘oh you just want an excuse not to feel vulnerable again.’ You’ve taken nothing on board, not understood anything. You’ve thrown things at me and I’ve not attacked you

rip into cerebellum
I love women’s pain and fear
schizophrenic’s echo voice                                u don’t do anything
FOREST creepy it’s (ill)(tin)(try)
so focussed can’t remember reality of perch        dropout
dick melt explosively                        widow no longer in control
Theme                                    silence golden
satanism a reaction of christianity, like lust for murder, its all a reaction to its being taboo, they want to drive us to fuck up
when you actually meet him go to the (soil) and o BAYa, augh        how wide can a jaw go
bouncy shoes        (line) black apples
rag up lady young man bites open
spongy web forest    judderman                        tie up      I like you
4 yrold    love    line
murderer or rapist revels in it now finds it gone and mourns the loss of his life ‘I want my life back’
fox in hole shared by lion   jumps out of hole to grab (other) fox   distraction       block and duck   uppercut under arm
geometry maths dehumanised incarnation of facts robotised passive, no individual thought (hard times Dickens)
darling, come, we must have words.
Dance with me in the moonlight,
When your Sun is gone,
You will not dance for long.
lovey dovey weak        passion not        don’t need pidge        cannot decry – without would be boring and escape E’s interest        cowardly silent about Gelf <–> perversion    difficult of absence of E return to cold and at first shivering intent        diaphanous very light easy to see through         calliope chin whap
throwaway, rotting – what they don’t understand